Soul Perspectives on ...
Relationship Messages
by Andrew Schneider,
The Soul Journey
There are basically four levels of soul contact
that we experience in our relationships : within
ourselves, with each other, with the world, and
with the Universe/God. These levels are
psychologically all expressions of love.
Whenever there is lack of unity or disconnection
it is because one of the following soul
invitations are not being responded to.
1. Pay attention to me. (I exist; I am here; see
me; notice me) Whenever any being meets another
there is a demand for attention. This can easily
be seen in human interactions where we seek to
communicate with each other. Communication
requires attention. When others do not pay
attention to us we feel cut off or separate.
Itis the essence or soul of things and beings
which automatically and always sends out this
message: Pay attention to me! The soul is the
magnetic energy of unity. It attracts other
souls.
Non-human realities do this as an emanation of
what they are, and consistently send out the
same message. Unlike humans, however, they are
incapable of being upset when ignored. Human
beings often camouflage this message with
distortions of who they are, and with
behaviour that alienates rather than attracts. We need
to be perceptive enough to go beyond the
distortions and masks to see and hear the
essential invitation to connection, regardless
of what the behaviour is.
This stage of contact is about valuing or
validating one?䏭 uniqueness. It demands
attention to individuality. Our response could
be:
a.) from a human soul level we notice how
someone is different and unique. We can also
acknowledge their efforts, skills and talents.
b.) from a spiritual soul level we notice how
someone is beautiful i.e., their uniqueness
shows us their beauty. We can also acknowledge
soul qualities or attributes they have.
2. Love me. At a deeper level beyond . Pay
attention to me. soul emits the message: Love
me! Once we get the other?䏭 attention, this is
the next message we can hear. Love is the
essence of soul ??the essence of our essence.
When we do not love ourselves, then our
behaviour will reflect this invitation to
connection ??even though it may be inappropriate
behaviour to achieve that end.
On a feeling level we are searching for
validation of our acceptability, goodness,
worthiness, valuableness. When we don't get the
responses from others that we want we frequently
go to the mental level and try to affirm or
justify our rightness. This is like
saying,
?𦲀f I can?脌 be acknowledged for my
goodness,
then at least I can be right.??We might also
reject others through blame or other judgments
when we do not get the love from them that we
want.
These first two messages (pay attention to me
and love me) come from personality, from the
human soul, not aligned with the spiritual soul,
but yearning toward that inner connection. Since
it is not achieved inwardly, it seeks it
outwardly through others ??which is what
personalities always do.
3. Be one with me. Beyond the invitation to
?樌ove me,??when one is connected to the love
within, to the spiritual soul, in a conscious
way, there is a love that sees the other as
oneself and therefore seeks to unite with that.
It is an invitation to share, to cooperate, to
give and take, to mutual commitment, to honour
and respect.
The invitation to deeper connection is based on
the need to share the love that one has
acknowledged and activated within oneself, and
the perception that this expression requires a
unity with others. This unity often leads to
service beyond the relationship itself.
4. We are one. We experience there are one
when we enter the Beauty of the other in our
heart. This is the deepest level of soul
emanation and soul consciousness. This state of
unity is a profound affirmation of the oneness
of life as we identify with it.
Conclusion
These four messages come from the soul and can
be heard only by the heart of another. The heart
will hear them if it is not preoccupied with its
own survival or individual well-being. When we
are not getting the responses we want to either
of the first two requests, there is disruption
to meaningful or fulfilling relationships.When
this is the case a person needs to do the
following:
a) Identify these messages being put out to
others b) Examine how they are being
communicated c) Look at the needs behind these
messages and d) Make the necessary adjustments
without expecting others to change. This might
require going to the third level of soul
emanation and focusing on the love that one has
to express.
The first two messages: Pay attention to me and
Love me are in the realm of personality
functioning. When they are issues, conflicts
arise and help is often sought to reduce the
conflicts.
The third message :Be one with me is in the
realm of spiritual soul expression and arises in
matters of shared values, service, meaning and
purpose.
The fourth message :We are one is in the
realm of spiritual soul where there is no
conflict and no question. All is well. This is
the consciousness goal we all strive for. The
soul journey moves us through these four levels
of soul contact and expression.
Exercises:
1. Examine a particular problematic
relationship you have in light of the four
levels. (If there is a real problem, it is
about level #1 and/or #2.)
2. Verbalize how the soul messages are being
communicated to you or by you.
3. Identify the needs behind the messages.
4. Decide what responses you will make in
order to improve the relationship.